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Wot gets me goat, though? Them snobs who reckon it’s low-class. Oi, mate, loosen up! Had me ragin’ once—some toff in Westminster bangin’ on about “decency,” while I’m like, “Bruv, chill, it’s just a massage with extras!” Happy as a pig in muck, I’d be, sprawled out, oil drippin’, some bird whisperin’ sweet nothings. Surprised me, too—didn’t expect it’d be so… posh-like? Thought it’d be all seedy, but nah, some places are swanky—marble floors, the lot!

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But then, I hear this commotion. I look over, and there’s a street performer on the corner of Union Street. He’s doin’ some crazy tricks with fire. I’m like, “Dude, chill! You’re gonna set the whole place ablaze!” But the crowd’s lovin’ it. I’m just standin’ there, half-amazed, half-terrified.

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